Hope (Things That Matter Book 2) Read online

  Table of Contents

  Copyright

  Other Titles by Casey Diam

  Chapter One

  Chapter Two

  Chapter Three

  Chapter Four

  Chapter Five

  Chapter Six

  Chapter Seven

  Chapter Eight

  Chapter Nine

  Chapter Ten

  Chapter Eleven

  Chapter Twelve

  Chapter Thirteen

  Chapter Fourteen

  Chapter Fifteen

  Chapter Sixteen

  Chapter Seventeen

  Chapter Eighteen

  Chapter Nineteen

  Chapter Twenty

  Chapter Twenty-One

  Chapter Twenty-Two

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  Chapter Twenty-Four

  Chapter Twenty-Five

  Chapter Twenty-Six

  Chapter Twenty-Seven

  Chapter Twenty-Eight

  Chapter Twenty-Nine

  Chapter Thirty

  Chapter Thirty-One

  Chapter Thirty-Two

  Chapter Thirty-Three

  Chapter Thirty-Four

  Chapter Thirty-Five

  Chapter Thirty-Six

  Chapter Thirty-Seven

  Chapter Thirty-Eight

  Chapter Thirty-Nine

  Chapter Forty

  Chapter Forty-One

  Chapter Forty-Two

  Chapter Forty-Three

  Chapter Forty-Four

  Chapter Forty-Five

  About the Author

  Copyright © 2018 by Casey Diam

  All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, distributed, or transmitted in any form or by any means, including photocopying, recording, or other electronic or mechanical methods, without the prior written permission of the author, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical reviews and certain other noncommercial uses permitted by copyright law. For permission requests, please contact [email protected]. Thank you for supporting writers and respecting the hard work of this author.

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places, and incidents either are the products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, businesses, companies, events, or locales is entirely coincidental.

  The author acknowledges the trademarked status and trademark owners of various products, bands, and/or restaurants referenced in this work of fiction, which have been used without permission. The publication/use of these trademarks is not authorized, associated with, or sponsored by the trademark owners.

  https://www.caseydiam.com

  Copyeditor: Jovana Shirley, Unforseenediting

  Cover Design and Formatting: Jersey Girl Designs

  Proofreading: AW Editing

  Proofreading: The Passionate Proofreader

  Other Titles By Casey Diam

  Romantic Suspense

  Things That Matter Series

  Trust

  Hope

  Contemporary

  Keeping Her Close

  Chapter One

  Paige

  As Caleb pulled to a stop at the curb, I hurried to his familiar, sleek black two-door car. It still had its brand-new car smell. The familiarity should comfort me, but the car was another accessory provided to him by his father.

  That made me wonder what he really did for his father.

  I settled into the seat and drew the seatbelt over my chest, stopping short when a quiet anger bled through the calmness of his voice.

  “This is where you ended up? I have to wonder sometimes. Are you purposefully putting yourself in these situations? Do you have to work at a bar until three fucking a.m., a gym until midnight, and run off on your own, only to end up in the worst fucking neighborhood in the city? Really, Paige!”

  Something was changing. I wasn’t used to him reacting this way, but it didn’t stop the sarcasm waiting at the tip of my tongue. “Oh, yeah. Please tell your brother and your freaking father how much I looked forward to them coming to my house when I was fifteen and killing everyone I’d ever loved. How thrilled I am that they’re still threatening my life or trying to kidnap me. That is what they wanted to do tonight, wasn’t it? They were trying to take me. It was why there was a car waiting. They were planning to kidnap me, weren’t they?”

  “I don’t know what their plan was.”

  “Well, maybe you should stop worrying what I do and focus on why you don’t know anything or why you’re so scared of your brother. You were hiding from him tonight, weren’t you?” A blob swelled in my throat. “When they attacked me, I saw you; you were coming, and then you were gone.”

  “Rob was there; you didn’t need me.”

  He was wrong. I had needed him, not anyone else.

  I peered through my window and felt a hot tear slide down my cheek. A hand touched my arm, but I shrugged it off, curling into the door.

  After a few minutes, Caleb said, “You didn’t want me to kill that guy, and it’s the same reason I didn’t come to you. I can’t let them figure out that I know you, Paige. Not yet. If Rob hadn’t been there or if it seemed like you needed my help, I would’ve”—he drew in a breath and sighed—“I would’ve come to you.”

  He turned up the alternative music station that’d been playing softly in the background, and I continued to lean against the car door, remembering how a much similar one had almost cracked my skull open a few weeks ago. His brother had been aiming to hurt me that time, yet I was still here. Caleb was still by my side. I turned my head, and as I glanced at him, I caught his eyes on me. He’d been watching me. His eyes moved back to the road, and I folded my salty, wet lips between my teeth.

  ❧

  When I came out of the bathroom in my usual tights and tank top, Caleb was sitting on the couch, his eyes on the screen of his phone. I walked into the kitchen and saw a cup of chamomile tea steeping on top of the wooden kitchen island. The muscles in my stomach tightened. Caleb wasn’t a tea person, but he knew I was. The coldness inside me thawed before I touched the cup. This was the Caleb I knew, the one who could read my emotions and react in a way that made me want to tread closer, not further away. After removing the small plastic cap blocking the steam from escaping, I lifted the cup and walked toward the leather couch with caution.

  He was right. This studio apartment was too small for the three of us—Caleb, me, and the tension between us.

  “Would you prefer the bed or the couch tonight?” he asked.

  Most nights, I slept on the couch because I was smaller and this was his place, not mine. I would sleep on the couch every night if he didn’t insist otherwise.

  “The couch is fine.”

  “I want to introduce you to the guys tomorrow. You know Calvin, and you saw Rob, but there are two more who have been keeping their eyes on you. I should’ve told you, but I just figured it would be okay as long as you were safe when you weren’t with me.”

  I reached for the breakfast tray at the center of the large ottoman, pulling it toward me so that I could set the hot cup on top of it before pulling my knees to my chest and hugging my legs. “I want to say I would have been okay with it if you had told me before. Hey, I want to say I’m okay with it now, especially after tonight, but they can’t possibly be playing my security guards for free.”

  “Don’t worry about it. It’s the least I can do. We’ll talk tomorrow. Getting all worked up while you drink your tea will only defeat the purpose of the tea.” A smile tugged at the corner of his mouth. “I just didn’t want you to go to bed without knowing that I’m looking out for you.”

  “Thank you.” I
hadn’t done anything to deserve his kindness.

  Combing a hand through his tousled black hair, he stood.

  I couldn’t help but admire his long, lean, and powerful physique, which obscured the previous tension in the air and created an entirely different kind. My skin warmed, and all of a sudden, I was parched. After what’d been discovered tonight with Alex Connor possibly being Caleb’s dad, Bailey’s confirmation of Caleb being Olivia Sawyer’s son, and my knowing Carrie and Peter Wells were my real parents, not Leanne and David Sawyer, our worst fear of being related was far from possible and never to be uttered again. My parents were killed, the real ones and the ones who raised me. The only thing we didn’t know was why it happened. How did all these pieces fit together? And why was I taken?

  My eyes never drifted from Caleb’s as I got lost in my thoughts. I should be mad at him for the way he’d acted earlier and also for leaving me to fight for myself. Instead, I was gazing at him and wondering where we would go from here.

  Chapter Two

  Caleb

  The last time I’d checked my phone, it was sometime after four in the morning. I couldn’t sleep, and since my usual wake-up time was around six in the morning, I knew I wouldn’t be getting any sleep tonight. All I could focus on was how close I’d come to losing Paige and how Alex Connor was potentially my real father, not my adopted father as he’d claimed for my whole life.

  As I listened to the quietness in the studio apartment, I could hear a pin drop, but that wasn’t what I heard. It was Paige and her breathing growing heavier. I waited a few seconds before switching on the bedside lamp and then another few seconds before getting out of the bed.

  I walked over to the edge of the ottoman and sat in front of the sofa, watching her in the dim light, wrapped in a white down comforter, still asleep, still beautiful, but her breathing was labored. I considered waking her, as it could be one of her nightmares, but before I could go through with it, she awoke.

  She gasped as she saw me and sat up, the comforter falling to her waist and her hand moving to press against her chest.

  “What’s wrong?” I asked.

  She shook her head and started to get up.

  I stopped her. “Hey, what’s the matter? Was it a nightmare?”

  A sniffle left her. “I’m okay.”

  She acted so strong and invincible sometimes that I forgot just how delicate she could be.

  My hands moved to her shoulders. “Paige, what’s going on?”

  “My heart.”

  “What?”

  “It’s nothing.”

  “It isn’t nothing.” One of my hands moved to the left side of her chest, over the soft curve of her breast, and before my mind could register the intimacy of my touch, the hotness of her skin and the rapid pulsation of her heartbeat spread through my palm and radiated into my own chest.

  “Shower,” she murmured.

  Confused, I cocked my head, and then it hit me. For the past two weeks, I’d been wondering why I sometimes woke in the middle of the night to the sound of the shower running. This would explain that. I stood and led her to the bathroom, and then stepped aside so she had room to move around.

  She stepped into the tub with her clothes on and turned the knob, flinching as the cold water hit her.

  What the fuck is she doing?

  Her arms folded across her chest as she shivered. I leaned on the bathroom vanity and watched her for a few minutes, and when she turned her head to me, my heart split in two. Because, right here, at this moment, she was making herself completely vulnerable to me.

  Closing my eyes, I scrubbed a hand across my forehead and went to the closet where I grabbed one of my clean T-shirts. I returned in time to see her stepping from the tub to the mat. With her blonde hair knotted on top of her head, only the edges framing her face had gotten wet. My eyes lowered to the now-transparent white tank top sticking to her skin and the taut nipples beneath. I pulled my gaze away before I needed a cold shower myself. Setting the clean T-shirt on the counter, I removed the additional towel folded under the sink since hers was most likely still damp from earlier.

  I wrapped it around her and pulled her to me, kissing the spot above her temple that had been injured in my car not long ago. She pressed her head to my bare chest, and something about having her like this centered me.

  “Get changed and come lie down with me. We need to talk,” I told her.

  This was me being strong and in control. She was tough enough by herself, but she’d been doing it alone for too long. So I needed to be impervious to this shit—everything that was unraveling around us—for her. I didn’t know how it’d happened so fast, but she was right; she’d become like family, too. Calvin and her, whether related by blood or not, they were my family, and I’d do anything to keep them safe.

  When she slid under the covers next to me, I leaned up on my elbow, and she curled onto her side, facing me.

  Her eyes lowered to my chest, and after a moment, she muttered, “Anxiety.”

  That was what I figured it was the first time I’d seen her have an attack on the sidewalk. “How long has it been going on?”

  She sighed and looked up at me, blue eyes weary. “A long time. I had it under control for a while, but with everything going on, it reminds me too much of the past, and I-I was stupid.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “I manipulated my therapist into believing I was okay by not really dealing with what had happened back then. Now that I’m being forced to deal with it, all my symptoms are coming back stronger.”

  “I’m guessing you’re not seeing a therapist now, but shouldn’t you be on some kind of medication?”

  She shook her head and closed her eyes. “I’m not.”

  “Why not?”

  “I can’t.”

  “Why?”

  She denied my invitation to talk with a slight jerk of her head again.

  “Paige, please.”

  She chewed on her lip, and I was reminded of how they always tasted like her bubblegum lip balm. My tongue slid over my lips, and I could almost taste her on them.

  Her lips moved, and I had to drag my eyes away, refocusing them on the tiny silver hoop piercing the innermost part of her ear.

  “I can’t afford it, and I hate pills. They made me numb to what I should feel.”

  I swallowed. She should still be living in a mansion, driving a fancy car, and going to some prestigious college. Instead, she was here with the son of the man who had done this to her because she had nowhere else to go.

  “I’ll take you. I’ll pay for it.”

  “No—”

  “Don’t fight this, Paige.” I smoothed a thumb over her cheek. “Let me do this for you.”

  “You’ve already done so much.”

  Her eyes found mine, and I watched as her pupils dilated until most of the blue was gone.

  I’m mesmerized by it every time it happens.

  Blood traveled down my body, infiltrating the thick root of desire I’d buried two weeks ago, and a muscle moved in my jaw. I shouldn’t feel like this. Not after what we’d been through. What made it worse was that I could still see the same want burning in the depths of her own eyes. And, though we could both use a distraction, the guilt of last week’s experience...wondering if we’d crossed a line we didn’t know existed, leveled my awakening.

  I dropped my hand from her cheek. “It doesn’t matter. You can’t go on like this. I’m surprised your body hasn’t shut down from all the lack of sleep and the energy you must expend trying to hide it from everyone alone.”

  She remained quiet.

  “The condo should be ready next week. Move in with Calvin and me. You’ll be safe there.”

  She shook her head, ready to protest, but I hushed her. Resting my hand on her shoulder, I started a slow caress before the invincible Paige could surface.

  “Hear me out. If we have any hope of finding out what happened to you and your family, I need you to get better at dea
ling with what happened. If you feel safe, you’re more likely to sleep through the night, right?”

  She gave me a barely there nod, so I kept going. “I know you don’t want to, but I think you should quit the gym, too.” Her perfect lips parted, and I stopped her before she could voice the protest I knew was coming. “Quitting the gym means they’ll lose the trail, giving you time to deal. If they can’t find you, they’ll think you’ve disappeared again, and by the time they figure out you’re still here, we’ll have a plan to take them down for good.”

  “He’s your dad.”

  “I know.” I didn’t know—yet.

  A small part of me hoped it wasn’t true. But one of Alex Connor’s puppets, Tom—also known as Tee—had given me this information in exchange for his life, and since then, a thousand different things had been racing through my mind. Things that didn’t add up. Like Alex Connor not giving a shit about me. Still, I would need to confront him about everything, even knowing there could be repercussions, and this time, I had no idea what they would be. That meant I needed to keep Paige out of it. It was the only way to guarantee her safety.

  Her eyes closed and her voice softened. “I’ll move in with you guys, but I’m not quitting my job...I’ll talk to my manager about taking a leave of absence. It could be our way of luring them back in when we’re ready.”

  “Sounds good. We’ll wait until it’s the right time.” Too bad I was already thinking of ways to keep her out of it.

  I could tell my “father” I knew everything, but that would be like handing him a bullet from my own gun. A bullet that he’d load into his own weapon before aiming the gun in my direction and pulling the trigger. I needed to be smarter, two steps ahead.

  “Just so you know, my room will be right across from yours. I’ll leave my door unlocked so that if you have a nightmare or need anything, you can come to me.”

  “Caleb, do you think we’ll...”

  My eyes traveled to her now-flushed cheeks and then to her lower lip being sucked into her mouth as she nibbled on it. The impending question breathed life into my own selfish needs. She was back to her shy, pre-sex allure, and I knew exactly where her mind was. It made my cock twitch in anticipation.